Am I in Labour? A Guide to Early Signs and Stages
I wanted to tackle this question because it’s one I hear often from first-time parents and mothers. After supporting a client recently through a beautiful hospital water birth, I thought it was a great time to share some thoughts. This birth followed her previous experience of a home birth a few years back, which, while wonderful, ended with unexpected challenges. After an amazing labour, she experienced a significant blood loss that required immediate medical intervention. This experience brought a mix of emotions for her during this most recent birth. The unpredictability of labour and birth had left some lingering fear and vulnerability about what could unfold after delivery. Imagine the contrast: you’ve just had a fulfilling, empowering labour and birth, bonding with your newborn, and yet your body unexpectedly takes a turn. Going from a physiological birth to a critical postpartum situation is something very few parents—birthing or not—are truly prepared to handle emotionally.
For this birth, we approached preparation a bit differently. We dedicated sessions to exploring how to create a calm, empowering space no matter the setting, and we worked on reducing any lingering fears around childbirth. We talked through what to expect in possible emergency scenarios and discussed ways to prepare for different outcomes so that she could feel more confident, regardless of what happened. One big question for my client was when to head to the hospital. Her previous birth experience had been incredibly positive, but after what she went through postpartum, she wanted to be certain she was making the safest choice for herself and her new baby. Preparing for this birth meant finding the right balance between the empowerment she felt before and the security she now needed.
For many parents (often first time parents), understanding the signs of labour can feel confusing and even overwhelming, especially since first-time mothers’/parents’ haven’t gone through this experience before. Adding to the uncertainty is the medical perspective on labour: What does labour look like to a doctor or midwife? When is it officially considered labour by professionals? When should you expect support and be taken seriously?
On top of that, we have decades of misleading portrayals of birth in TV and film that add to the confusion. Media rarely shows the true range of what labour can look like—how labour can start with your waters (membranes) breaking and how that may or may not mean your baby will arrive soon. Sometimes labour takes hours, other times days, but the fast-paced, high-drama births we’re shown don’t often reflect reality; the movie scene where the mom-to-be clutches her belly, shouts, and rushes off to deliver her baby mere minutes later. So…
How do you know you’re in labour?
Understanding the signs, knowing what to expect, and having confidence in your body’s cues can help reduce some of that uncertainty. Labour isn’t always as it appears on screen, but it’s every bit as transformative. Labour is a beautifully layered process, each stage holding its own purpose, challenges, and gifts. Understanding the stages of labour can help you feel more in tune with your body and less like you’re on a roller coaster of unknowns. It’s a journey where physical strength, mental focus, and even a touch of spirituality can guide you through each unfolding stage.
The Early Stage: The Gentle Beginnings
In early stages of labour, your body often sends subtle signs that it’s preparing for the main event. These early indicators can happen gradually, sometimes even weeks before active labour truly begins.
One common sign is the mucous plug or “bloody show,” a mucousy discharge that may have streaks of pink or red. This plug seals the cervix during pregnancy and its release can mean that your cervix is starting to soften and open.
And, engagement—when your baby “drops” or descends into the pelvis—is a big milestone in preparation for birth. It often means the baby’s head is getting closer to the cervix, which can lead to more pressure in the pelvis but also some relief in your upper abdomen, making it easier to breathe. These early signs don’t guarantee that labour is imminent, but they’re signals that your body is preparing, a gentle preview of the journey to come.
In the early labour, there are whispers rather than shouts. Contractions start as gentle waves, often resembling menstrual cramps or lower back pain. They’re irregular and may start and stop—sometimes for hours or even days. Many people find this stage surprisingly manageable and may feel like they can “carry on as usual.” This is the time to breathe, rest, and embrace the slowness, perhaps even feeling excitement as your body hints at what’s to come. It’s a bit like the opening act of a concert; you know the big event is coming, but for now, the vibe is mellow.
Spiritually, early labour is a time of tuning in. It’s a period to connect with yourself, to ground, and maybe even meditate on the journey ahead. If you’re feeling anxious, remember that this phase is your body’s way of saying, “There’s no rush.” Trust the gentle rhythm and use this time to create an atmosphere of calm and comfort. Many find that playing soothing music, watching rewatching TV shows/movies, breathing deeply or going on gentle walks can help set a supportive tone for the hours ahead.
Active Labour: The Rise and Flow
Active labour is when things start to intensify. Contractions and surges become stronger, more regular, and demand more of your focus. At this stage, it may feel like there’s no mistaking what’s happening—your body is fully engaged in the birthing process. This phase usually requires concentration and is where many people move into their birthing environment, whether at home, in a birth center, or at the hospital.
Spiritually, this is the “trust and surrender” stage. It’s the point where you may need to dig deep, centering yourself in the present moment as each surge comes and goes. I like to encourage my clients to think of it as riding a wave: if you try to resist, it can feel overwhelming, but if you go with it, you may find a sense of peace within the intensity. Practicing breathing techniques, using visualisations, and leaning into your support system can help you stay grounded.
Transition: The Intense Transformation
Transition is often the shortest but most intense phase of labour. Contractions are close together, powerful, and may feel overwhelming, pushing you to your limits. It’s common to feel doubt at this stage or even have moments of wanting to give up. Transition is labour’s final climb—a complete surrender as your body moves into the final stretch; this natural ejection process.
Spiritually, transition can feel like a test of faith and resilience. It’s a place where many tap into their deepest primal strength. This is when birth partners and doulas play another crucial role, providing words of reassurance and physical support. If you can remind yourself that this intensity is a sign you’re close to the end, it can help you lean into the moment.
Closing the Womb: Birth of the Placenta
Often overlooked but essential - the birth of the placenta is the final stage of labour - often known as the third stage of labour. Shortly after your baby arrives, your body will naturally contract again to help the placenta further detach from the uterine wall. This process usually takes anywhere from a few minutes to half an hour, and though less intense than active labour, it’s a vital part of postpartum recovery. In some clinical settings, it is routine for midwives and doctors to recommend the active management of the third stage of labour. This involves administering medication (synthetic oxytocin) that helps your uterus to perform that act of contracting and closing up the placental wound. Discuss this option further with your healthcare provider and/or Doula, to understand what is best for you.
Many find this stage to be a time of reflection, relief, and even awe, as it marks the completion of the birth process. The placenta, which nourished and sustained your baby throughout pregnancy, is now released. In many ways, this stage represents a shedding of the old self, clearing the path for the new identity of parenthood.
Remember,
…birth isn’t just about reaching the finish line; it can be about embracing each moment, knowing that every step brings you closer to meeting your baby.
